DatingGuideRelationship

Should Sex Be Included On a First Date?

How far is too far on a first date? First dates are intended to be a time for getting acquainted. A person should ask questions to learn about the likes and dislikes or maybe the hobbies and ambitions of his or her date. To expect more than this is too much. Try to make a first date about fun. Go to an amusement park or a zoo. The more public and activity-laden the better. The possibility for conversational lags is high. You need something to help break the ice and/or fill in the time. Find out if you even like this person or want to invest the time and possibly the cost of another date.

Touching is a good thing on a first date as long as it is kept on a friendship level. Anything beyond this may send signals that you did not intend. A tap on the arm or a light brush is normally considered not too forward by most people. Even a friendly hug if the opportunity seems appropriate would be acceptable. For a girl or woman to hold the man’s arm as they walk is a good thing if the date is going well. To lean a head on a shoulder except in a silly moment would be taken as a possible invitation to expect more. If a woman allows the front of her upper body to touch the arm of her companion as they walk would also be taken as an open door to go farther by most men.

The above tips can very well be found on a free dating app but it is you who has to implement everything as per the instructions given there in order to achieve success on your first date, which more often than not, ends up being a fiasco due to the couple getting off on the wrong foot, not quite helped by the shy, awkward feeling that both are feeling at such a tense moment and both becoming conscious of their behavior tends to make things worse.

Each step toward intimate behavior beckons for the next one to be taken. On a first date whether you are experienced sexually or not, this area needs to be approached with great caution. Not knowing how your partner will respond sometimes helps to keep things under control. This is an area of life where ignorance brings restraint, and knowledge can bring desire. The reality is that a first date is not the place to find out about the physical side of your date before you have had time to really explore the personality and life of the person.

First date sex is rarely brought on by attractions as much as it is by hormones. Before going on a first date, make whatever preparations you need to keep yours in check. Many opinions are formed on first dates. They tend to be lasting because if they are not good, there will not be another date to change them. Anyone worth keeping around will not expect sexual activity on the first date. Only predators go out looking to score without getting to know the other person. The risks of unpleasant outcomes including an STD is too great. You need the time of multiple dates and even better a more permanent commitment before taking this critical leap.

To keep from moving too far too fast, some simple concepts need to be applied. Remember that we prefer to go places that we are comfortable with. That is to say that if you have gone to edge of having sex with someone, you are much more likely to feel that the next step is a natural one to take with a familiar partner. As long as you can keep that familiarity at bay, you will not be as tempted to engage in sexual activity.

You need to decide ahead of time what your moral ground in this area is. Do you follow parental training, religious beliefs, or personal guidelines? Whatever it is, you need to review that before a first date and determine where the lines will be drawn and stick to them. This will give you restraint for yourself and the ability to say no to your date if the need arises.

Too often having sex on a first date can turn a potential relationship into a one-night stand. For a relationship to be built, trust, respect, and friendship must be established. All three of these are compromised by turning a first date into a sexual fling. Introducing too much alcohol, drugs, or too much private time can create an environment that will overwhelm your moral compass. On a first date, control is paramount. Control of the situation, your hormones, and the extent of the physical side of the date are always in the best interests of both parties.

Relationship

How to Keep a Lasting Relationship

I’m pretty sure I can say that almost everyone has had a significant other at some point in their life. When I say significant other, I simply mean a boyfriend or girlfriend. Now you may have had this person at any point in your life, and may have even had more than one. This could have happened while you were still in school. Once you entered the dating scene after getting out of college or any other schooling. Or even in your older age, while still in the whole dating scene. Like I said everyone has had a relationship, but not many people have the ability to hold on to one for a long time.

Staying with someone you hope to eventually love for a long time is something that can be very difficult, and has evaded many people. Everyone has had a boyfriend or girlfriend at some point or another, the only problem was keeping that person. Now breakups may happen for many different reasons. One person may mess up, and possibly cheat or something like that and end the relationship. The two people may just not be compatible with each other, and the relationship might just come to an end. The reasons for breakups are endless, but when you know you love someone the reason to stay with them is obvious.

When you know that you love someone, you must first understand that you are going to need to make sacrifices. Now I don’t mean drastic sacrifices, but you need to realize you are now trying to please another person. You need to keep this person happy and keep your love for one another. There are many different ways to go about this, with some being easier than others, and some being completely necessary for a relationship.

The first thing you need to make sure you always do is a compliment the other person, and let them know just how much you care for them. This will not only keep a relationship strong, but it also increases communication. What would a relationship be without communication? Therefore compliments are a complete necessity for any good and lasting relationship. You can also develop a really fun relationship with your partner and make them laugh all the time. You can find love quotes for her funny on this link. You can always use these funny quotes in order to make your partner and make the time that you spend with each other more memorable. 

A second thing you need to always make sure you do is to never forget about them or anything that has to do with them or the two of you. Now what I mean when I say that is, you need to make sure you remember dates, such as birthdays and your anniversary. You need to know and understand their beliefs. You basically need to know everything there is to know about the other person. Believe me, there is no bigger relationship killer, then forgetting about things that are special to the other person.

A third thing that you need to keep in mind is that you need to show the person you care with surprises and sometimes gifts. You could surprise them while they were at work, or possibly plan a special evening for the two of you. You could send flowers on a random date. Anything that surprises the other person, and lets them know that you care, will make any relationship so much stronger. Now obviously you are going to need to get a gift or something like that on birthday and other important dates like an anniversary, but the special times are when a surprise isn’t needed or expected, but you still surprise them.

Having someone you can call your own is one of the most rewarding things. Someone you love and care dearly for can make life so much easier. Unfortunately, a lot of times relationships just don’t work, and it is usually something very stupid that ends it. However the ending of a relationship is up to the two people involved in the relationship, therefore if you follow some of the guidelines above, and include more of your own, you are well on your way to a lasting relationship. The two biggest things in a relationship are one communication and two letting the other person know just how much you care for them and love them.

GuideRelationship

Ending an Affair: Critical Steps to Begin Mending Your Marital Foundation

Although the reasons, or circumstances, behind infidelity vary, the outcome is always the same; get caught, confess, or live a lie.

The best resolution, of course, is to confess.

Adulterers who confess are doing so by their own volition. Perhaps there is fear or threat that the spouse or significant other will catch wind of the illicit activity from someone else, or the unfaithful has awakened from fantasy-land and realize they want their life back. The confession of tracking the partner can also be made. Many people are using the sms trackers application for revelation of the truth. It will make the bond of relationship stronger.

Regardless of the motive for confession, those who confess are willing to take a great risk of either losing a marriage or severely crippling a relationship.

Adulterers who truly surrender infidelity recognize their mistake, seek guidance, and prepare for the consequences.

For those who wish to restore their relationship with a spouse or significant other, a tough journey is ahead. However, key steps to ending an affair will help both adulterer and betrayed spouse clear the slate and mend the broken foundation of commitment and trust.

The first thing an unfaithful spouse or partner should do is establish a small support group (one or two friends / family) to lean on. The adulterer may have pushed loved ones and friends aside while engaging in the affair, but now these individuals are needed the most. (If uncomfortable with a friend or family member, consult a licensed therapist or clergy member as an objective advocate.)

Once a support team is established, prepare to confess the adultery to the spouse or significant other and brace for the worst. There really is no good way to tiptoe around the subject. Be as direct as possible, yet tactful and sensitive to whatever reaction may be received; shock, anger, sadness, or all. (Remember, there may not be the “best time” or “right time” to lay it all out, however ensure there is significant time alone between the adulterer and betrayed to deal with the initial aftermath.)

The betrayed may barrage the unfaithful with questions, vulgarities, and demands. It is critical all questions or requests are answered as directly and thoroughly as possible. If details are too shameful or forgotten, commit to writing the events of the affair on paper. Retrace the past in a time-line of when the affair began, how it progressed, and why it is ending.

In order for the unfaithful to end the adulterous relationship, all contact must cease with the affair partner. Non-contact may be best established by letter, email, or telephone call with betrayed spouse present as witness. Dependant on the nature, or place where the adulterer and affair partner met, this environment must be avoided to eliminate contact.

Once non-contact has begun, the adulterer must submit to the betrayed partner’s requests, relinquish privacy, and commit to being 100% transparent. (Submitting to requests must be within reason; not physically damaging or abusive in nature.) Adulterer must realize that trust no longer exists in the relationship and the betrayed has every right to request Internet passwords, cell phone messages, and hold the adulterer accountable for all time spent outside the home.

It is essential that both partners seek outside counseling, either individually, together, or a combination. A professional who is experienced in marriage and family issues is preferred and best equipped to help.

The adulterer must remember that the betrayed does not owe the unfaithful anything. A betrayed partner who chooses to work through the infidelity is a gift to the adulterer. The adulterer must realize the full extent of the adulterous activity; broken marital vows, broken trust, and broken heart and do everything to help mend the foundation.

Although the adulterer is 100% responsible and accountable for the affair, the marriage or partnership does take two.

In time and commitment from both partners, trust can be re-established, cracks that led to the broken marriage can be mended, and renewed strength and devotion can lead to a better relationship and future.